| Manual Archives--June 2005 Main Blog June 29, 2005 - Happy birthday to me 
Another day, same old same old. I did get a letter from Jeremy, he's been transfered to Marion, OH. He says there are 24 deaf and lots of gays. He says it's nice to have someone to talk to but many of the deaf are violent and immature. He's keeping to himself and he got a job working in the kitchen and joined the baseball team. He's always loved baseball. He has a trophy for that from school. I guess that was the nicest present I could get. I'll be fine as long as I don't look at his picture anymore. My internet just went off AGAIN, so I'm calling the cable company, this is ridiculous. Have a great day kittens.
 pondered at 2:25pm Wednesday
|
June 26, 2005 - bleh
My cable has gone off every afternoon for the last 3 days. It's getting tedious as I am still behind on internet stuff from being gone for 4 days. I've re-did some pages but can't upload them. Can't surf or update voting links. grrrr This is not helping my bleak state of mind. It's been a hellish 3 days as all I can do is think of Jeremy. I distract myself with LOTR or Diego Luna films, but soon enough, the thoughts come crashing back. I had a massive panic attack when I saw his picture, I couldn't breathe, it was horrible. That picture of my child suffering knocked me to my knees. I feel my emotions so strongly they make me weak. God help me stop having these terrible vengeful thoughts about the girl who caused all this. Help me understand why injustice and badness just go on and on with no end in sight. We are not improving as a race, we are destructive and mean. We kill our young, rape our children, suffer from apathy, commit unspeakable evil on one another and animals, commit hate crimes, spawn serial killers, glorify sex and violence--forgive me, but on the belief that the Almighty is all powerful and ever watchful, what in the name of all that is holy is God waiting for? If he cares, why doesn't he do something? Where is he when a child is being raped and murdered? How can he stand it, I can't.
These are the thoughts that torment me. I know some of you will start thinking how loving God is and how there are many good people in the world. All I can says is I was a very devout Christian all my life and was doing fine until my child was molested by a pedophile in good standing in the church. This was in E. Palestine, OH. I was forbidden to call the police, told I was being unforgiving and needed to change my attitude and told to go to another church. This man and his wife and 2 sons ate with us, worshipped with us, they were our best friends. How could he have this filth on his mind and be one of God's chosen people? That one knocked me to my knees too, come to think of it. Oy. He was "reproved" and eventially forgiven. (How could you even let him touch you Sharon, after you knew he molested a child for a year? How??) I resigned from the church and now I do not attend one, I'm good and kind because I want to be, I like to be nice and I hate evil. I do not think God did these things, I know he didn't do them, but I'm stuck on why he let a little deaf boy (who is the perfect victim as he can't speak) be abused and now falsely accused and inprisoned? Why? This is not what I envisioned when I held my baby son in my arms. He grew into a sweet gentle young man and I've been proud of him all my life. He is my greatest joy and my greatest heartache. I am overwhelmed and very sad. I hope the cable comes back soon so I can update my sites and maybe stop thinking. Maybe now you understand why I own a domain called heart-stricken.net. Peace kittens.
pondered at 5:11pm Sunday
|
June 23, 2005 - I am broken
I am keening. I went and stayed with the Puppy Couple for 4 days just to get away from the madness and I come home to this.
omg
It's too much, do you see him? Do you see my bright beautiful boy is now a broken young man? Omg, look at my baby. Look what that girl did to my baby. It's too much. it's just too much omg I am howling it hurts too much it will never be okay ever ever again never
pondered at 7:13pm Thursday
|
June 19, 2005 - oy vey
What a weekend. *grumbles* I hate drama! My friend was pulled over and was arrested for being under the influence of narcotics. She left here Saturday night about 10pm and never came back. I was babysitting her little boy and I've been so worried. I found out an hour ago she is in jail at least until Weds. I am stunned. As much as I love my friend, I can't believe she was so stupid. Thank God her little son was home with me.
I hope this is not a trend. Now I know 2 people in trouble with the law. Why? It's so depressing. Or maybe I'm just old and tired. I'm going to watch LOTR and forget about it all for awhile. Peace, kittens.
pondered at 5:33pm Sunday
|
June 11, 2005 - the fun things I get to do
# 24!
Diego Luna ~ A Shrine
pondered at
|
June 7, 2005 - Woo hoo! I <3 LOTR!
I'm so excited! My order for Aragorn's Banner has been shipped and will be here this week. "This large blue flag features the legendary White Tree of Gondor, with the royal Crown overhead, and the Seven Stars of Gondor." It's 24" x 73" and will look glorious in my room. :P
It's from Mystic Caravan
pondered at 5:35pm Tuesday
|
June 6, 2005 - happy birthday to me! (soon) 
I'm indulging in some narcissism, my birthday is this month and this layout cracked me up. :P The thing is, now I have 2 red layouts and I always want my sites to be different colors and have a unique look and feel. Ah, well. The quandry of a creative nerd. Speaking of creating, I totally redid my Joe Satriani site and it looks sharp. Oh heck, I redid all my major sites. I'm in a creative phase and it's so easy to get into the html zone and design or redesign my websites. I'm a linguist, not a graphics creator unfortunately. I will alwys have to find pre-made sets for my sites as I am graphically challenged. lol Photo Shop and Paint Shop are just incomprehensible to me. I tried to understand. But when you start talking about vectors and noise and variants, my eyes glaze over and my brain doesn't get it. So, I give. html is my forte', and that's that. Thanks to all who make graphics for people like me. :P
Ok, enough rambling. I hope you like the layout, it makes me smile everytime I see it, and I need anything to smile about. Jeremy is in London, OH for the duration of his sentence. Give us strength for the months ahead.
I received this in an email.
Dear Deaf People:
If you do not want Deaf schools to close and then get involved inpolitics. We need Deaf people on the State Boards of Education's,Independent Living Councils, Rehabilitation Councils, School for theDeaf Board of Trustees and become proactive. For many years we left ourpolicy and decision's to the hearing people. Who's fault is that?Hearing people? No! It is the Deaf community's fault because we allowthat to happen. Fighting is nice but it will not work. Make laws!!! Ifyou want ASL to be recognized as a language and you need to submit aBill in the legislation. How to get Deaf people power?
(1) Get all Deaf people together
(2) Talk about goals and visions
(3) Plan on achieving goals
(5) Do not worry about English and there are people that will help you with writing. Just bring your energy and make sure that Deaf people'svoice is heard.
(6) Join a customer organization (NAD, and State Association FAD, TAD, etc.)
(7) Call the legislators on TTY and tell them the problem with closing of Deaf Schools. Make sure you explain why and keep it short.
(8) Attend Deaf clubs and keep yourself busy with plans and goals.
(9) Study Rehabilitation Act of 1973, Americans with Disabilities Act of1990, Individual Disabilities/Deaf Education Act and Individual Education Plan. (IEP)
(10) Study ASL and Deaf Culture and make sure you get correct information and Facts
(11) Contact with people who knows a lot about Deafness (Gallaudet, Clerc Center, ASLTA, etc.)
(12) Write letters to the newspapers (Editorial)
(13) This is a life long process and must do different things every year to keep Deaf people busy. Establish a network.
(14) MAKE YOUR VOICE HEARD and tell the hearing people WE WILL NOW HANDLE ALL POLICY AND DECISION MAKING FOR THE DEAF PEOPLE IN THE STATE!
(15) E-mail this to as many people you know and get them educated and involved!
(16) Get Busy Now!
Deaf Power,
Stephen Joseph Hardy, II - President/Advocate
Florida Association of the Deaf, Inc. (FAD)
Post Office Box 651, Archer, Florida 32618 USA
Facsimile: 1 (352) 495-6601
Electronic Mail: fad@fladeaf.org
Internet: http://www.fladeaf.org
"Deafness is not a barrier but it is a big misunderstanding."
pondered at 4:25pm Monday
|
June 1, 2005 - I have nothing wise nor witty to say
It's June. Already. It is?
I am finally able to blog. The cyber gods have been most unhappy with me lately. All last week heart-stricken.net was offline so I changed servers and all is well. (shhhh!) Then for the past 3 days, godaddy.com who is my server for this domain, has crashed, hesitated, and sputtered. Today I can finally access ftp and so forth.
I had company for 2 days, nothing else has changed. I'm in a bit of a funk so I remodeled here, here and here. Have a good weekend kittens.
pondered at 7:11pm Friday
|
Main Blog Blog Archives 2004-2007
|