Sept. 30, 2004--donations accepted!!!

Time for a decent blog entry! Hello kittens. Well it looks like we might have Jeremy home by Oct.10. I can only hope. I didn't get to visit him Saturday cuz my name wasn't on the list, but Christy did and I got to wave at him and blow him a kiss. He was on the 3rd floor looking out a window. Chris says he perked up when she told him his bail was lowered and we could get him out. I apopoligize for being shameless, but if anyone can make a donation, I would be so happy! *see button at left* I want my son home where he belongs, I have so much to tell him!
I am rather pleased with myself. All this experience making web pages is paying off. I've made some sites for other people and made $80 this month! I hope I can do a few more soon. I have a client who sells Mary Kay and we have been looking at different layouts because she wants a web page. Now that I know how to do PayPal, it makes my web page building expreience even more complete. She is very excited and we work together very well. I'm also practicing with my Adobe and PSP and trying different things. I charge less if I don't make the graphics, but I seem to get lucky once in a while and some come out very good! lol Banners and buttons are my forte, so we'll see how it goes.
Have a great weekend everyone! 11 more days and Jeremy could be home!!!!!! Yippee!

pondered at 5:12 pm Friday

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Sept. 27, 2004--donations accepted!!!

I'm feeling better, can you tell? *smile*

pondered at 9:10 pm Monday

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Sept. 24, 2004--donations accepted!!!

OMG! Jeremy's bail was lowered to $30,000 which means we only need $2000 to get him out!!! We are about $500 short, but I think we can get that by October 7. Omg! Do I get my hopes up? Do I dare? I want my son home so badly. Oh my, I'm going to the Puppy Couple's house for the weekend, (all is mended and they have WebTV) and we are going up tomorrow to see him at last! That doesn't mean we will see him knowing the police there, but we will try. I hope I'm still on his list, I hope I hope. I must go, the girls will be here shortly. Think positive thoughts for us and thanks! Brittany! Email me sweetie!!

pondered at 2:54 pm Friday

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Sept. 20, 2004--...........

Jeremy has been in jail 2 months. Can I think of nothing else? No, I can't. Every Saturday that I don't see him gets to me. Chris is taking it in stride, everyone is but Brittany and I. Chris says we are obsessed. I thought it was just that I don't want ANYONE I love in a horrible place like jail for something they didn't do. I want him home. I miss him. I ache for him everyday, hoping he's ok, praying nobody is messing with him, etc. Ah, I've become old and tired overnight.

pondered at 3:59 pm Monday

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Sept. 17, 2004--ouch

Oy, Hello kittens. I had out-patient surgery Friday afternoon and it was awful. The doctor didn't wait for the local anesthetic to work and when he cut, I felt it and almost screamed. I held on to the bed rails and counted my way through the unpleasant ordeal. I was sent home with an antibiotic and Vicodan. I feel like a smashed enchilada. I think I'm going to bed to slip into blessed oblivion. I hope I feel better when I wake up. Have a great weekend kittens.

pondered at 11:55 pm Friday

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Sept. 15, 2004--mood swing

This is how I feel.

pondered at 7:30 pm Wednesday

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Sept. 14, 2004--well phooey

Greetings. I'm listening to Satriani on only one channel as one of my speakers on my boombox refuses to work today. Always something irritating me it seems.
Oy. Jeremy is still in that god awful place and now his attorney is asking for another continuance on Sept.29 which means we won't go to trail for another month and he sits in there longer and longer for something he didn't even do. This is reallly eating away at me. I feel helpless, powerless, frustrated and so sad. I'm smoking way too much and my lungs are screaming at me. I'm eating sporadically--I stand there and look at the food and I have no appetite. I've never liked cooking for only myself, I love to cook for Jeremy and his friends. But the joy has gone out of everything somehow. I don't sleep well, every little noise wakes me up. I am worn out with no relief in sight and suddenly I feel very old. Later kittens.

pondered at 3:25 pm Tuesday

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Sept. 13, 2004--donations accepted

I'm not here.

pondered at 5:45 pm Monday

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Sept. 10, 2004--donations accepted

Nothing new, I'm bored, lonely and blue. I'm going for a generic blog layout here so this site looks different from the rest which number 11 right now. I'm working on heart-stricken Top 50 Women's Sites, a listing of well designed sites made by women. Graphic designers, poets, wiccans and women who know their way around html are encouraged to join. I see so many beautiful sites out there, I wish I had them all in one place! Maybe that will happen if I invite my favorite graphic designers to join. Otto and Kelly, this means you! lol ttyl



pondered at 6:30 pm Friday

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Sept. 8, 2004--donations accepted

Hello kittens. I am very sad and I think I shall remain so. I've never felt so totally alone before. Jeremy is all I have. But he's not here.
Mike being here was at first magical, but then reality reared it's ugly head and I remembered the age old addage "To try in vain is pointless." He's on AIM as I type this. I bought him purpguy.com as a going away present, for he truly has gone away from what we had.

Rawrgar: how u?
Melancholia9012: sad
Melancholia9012: u?
Rawrgar: k

My Beloved is gone. My heart aches because I miss him so.

pondered at 2:08 am Wednesday

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Sept. 6, 2004--donations accepted

My Beloved was here. For a few precious hours, all was right with the world.

pondered at 4:00 am Monday

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Sept. 1, 2004--donations accepted

Oy vey, where is this year going to? It's already September. Jeremy's trial starts Sept.29, I have a feeling it's going to be a long month. I've noticed that ever since the cops came and got him I don't feel safe in my house anymore. I get very anxious at night, but that could be cuz I'm not used to living alone. I find myself just staying home with the door locked only venturing out for supplies. I go days without seeing anyone now that Brittany went home and back to school. I miss her and Jeremy most of all. His python is growing and he's missing it. *sigh* I'm going to talk to my friend Sheila later and see if she can take me to see Jeremy Saturday and possibly help me look for a car so I can be independent. Sheila's been my friend for 9 years, through thick and thin. I treasure her and her little boy Ethan. He starts kindergarten this year. They grow up so fast...
Have a great hump day kittens. Peace.

pondered at 3:15 pm Wednesday

So much for optimism. The Puppy Couple came and got Jeremy's SSI check, they claim he wrote them a letter asking them to get it. He hasn't written to me about it, I'm totally confused and angry. I have no idea how I'm supposed to pay the bills this month now. And I actually thought I could get a cheap car. Ha! Depression--anger without enthusiasm.

pondered at 8:05 pm Wednesday

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